Blackberries & Steak

Blackberries have inched their way into my mind...i'm thinking i like them more than flowers. 

glorious boneless chuck roast

  A lot of times i feel like i can not find the images i'm looking for.yeah i can find  images of steaks on the web but it is so much more experiential to put the images together...have a friend model, or buy a juicy red steak to photograph.  building them myself and dissecting them visually  is a process that resonates. it is exciting for me to put together images and watch them evolve from a photos into flesh that is made by hand through oils; paints that are rather fleshy themselves...  

thoughts on the 30

Reflecting back on the 30 studies made for the growth series, i feel like the way i approached the studies did  not help me in the long run. i became to focused on my existing ideas  for compositions instead of focusing on  experimenting with the idea of growth and the human form. i felt like they failed.  however, i know there is something to be gained and that is never a failure.

the critique of these studies brought to my attention the issue of my imagery being too literal. this was something i was not consciously aware of and now that it is  in the future i can make a conscious choice to be literal or not. but for now,  the question and challenge on my mind is how to incorporate the figure  and the idea of growth without visually spelling out everything for the viewer? how do i pursue portraiture with this? keeping these ideas in mind, i am in the process of making adjustments to my original ideas  in order to work on being less literal. things i am considering further are: paint application...the movement i include naturally, being more gestural and painterly as mentioned before, unpersonified flesh as a thread in the paintings, different stages of plant growth, different kinds of plant symbolism, how the figures relate to other elements in the paintings, what emotions are evoked.

here are some artists i find interesting:

A portrait (above)  by Anders Zorn. what interests me  about his works is the heavy brush strokes found in his paintings; there is evidence of his hand and at the same time  fine rendering as seen in the face of the portrait. i find the artists Jenny Saville and Justin Mortimer interesting for the same reason. however they also depict subjects that disturb and create a mood of discomfort. having a slightly gothic nature, i am drawn to the macabre.

Paintings by Justin Mortimer above; a Saville below

Finally, there is one more artist i feel i should mention and that is Frida Kahlo.  Since i have started studying painting  i have had people tell me repeatedly that something about what i do  as a painter brings her to mind for them.  i believe that there is something in the kind of images that i come up with; they have a surreality to them, there is a story behind them and they are often rooted in personal experience.

think i just need to write

 this series comes from a personal space.  i think for me its mostly about sharing, maybe people will makes sense of the image as it pertains to myself, maybe not. they might find their own meaning in it. i am interested in what my art brings up for others as well as myself.  that is probably nothing new. i like that idea...if that makes sense.

 i am reexamining my ideas for  the growth series. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going.  but i am engaged and going...thinking. at this point i figure what I'm doing is portraits that have an element of unpersonified growth  to them.  I'm not sure if the series will  to focus on the  unersonified aspects more than the figure  but i do want to play with those to things together... we'll see as i go through painting them. With the paint in mind, I'm trying to let go and develop a more painterly hand. more gesture and thicker layers, while also maintaining  attention to detail.

I've started with the first one  and had a thought,  whether or not to make the meat stand out  from the figure through different lighting ( figures in the red light, while the meat in regular warm lighting) or have the meat  and the person in the same lighting scheme.... i will play around with this quality a bit more.
 progression:

some reminders for kate

Let go!


Let go of the literal.


You dont have to figure it all out now.


Let the paint say something.


Ultimately you can't control everything.


Try harder, push yourself.


Paint what you want.


Let Go!


...my brain hurts a bit. i am certain that is not bad.